Is Being Single A Bad Thing?

Is being single in your teens/twenties really as bad as they make it out to be?


I’m verging on 20 in two months, and I love being single. Yes, I do want to eventually tie myself down with marriage and a family – but as an independent Gen Y woman, I am quite happy to stay single for a while.

The stigma behind being single is that you’re lonely. I’m not lonely – I have friends and books and words. I have the internet – I can live without the night cuddles for a few more years.


In true writer fashion, I am an independent person – and the more time I spend with people, the less I focus on my writing. People (particularly boyfriends) seem to be a huge distraction from my writing life. That’s not to say I’m going to cut society out – every writer knows that the best way to find your voice, is to live life to it’s fullest and experience the world.

“Write what you know”  – Mark Twain

But this distraction-base isn’t limited to writers. I know so many couples that just get in each others way. They skip rehearsal because otherwise they miss dinner for a third night in a row. They say goodbye to the gym because the girlfriend wants to watch a movie. They miss girls night out because the boyfriend is complaining that he hasn’t seen her all week.


Teens, especially undergraduates, are always being told to live our lives whilst we still can  – so why are we so ready to give up the freedom that youth gives us in order to settle in with a partner?

I don’t know, I’ve never done it. I’ve never even come close.

I could pin it all on conformities and leave it at that, but I don’t think that’s the whole truth.


We want to be safe, it’s the comfort of knowing when you come home from a hard day someone is there to listen to you. It’s nice knowing there’s always someone on your side. But maybe safety isn’t the best thing for a person just discovering themselves.

I am ready to love someone, but I’m not ready to settle and be safe. If I met someone now, they would have to understand that I won’t be crying on their shoulder. I won’t be whinging that I never see them. I won’t be wondering what they are doing every minute of the day. I have a life to live, and I won’t put that on hold for a guy. I won’t put that on hold for anything or anyone.

I’m a Gen Y woman and I am happy being single. Are you?


Got a comment? Post it below, or continue the discussion on Twitter @melissaholden94


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